All great things take time

It’s easy to alqays be thinking of the end. Constantly dreaming about how amazing it will be once you accomplish x. What we’ll be able to do.

The end is the fun part. You’ve already worked hard enough. You don’t have to worry about pushing harder, you’ve done it. You’ve accomplished what you set out to do.

We’re all playing the end game. But what about the days leading up to our accomplishment?

What about all that hard work we put in day in and day out? What about all those times when you wanted to give up? That’s the struggle. 

The struggle is the day to day work you put in to reach your goals. Struggle isn’t sexy. It’s not recognized by many people. It’s usually not fun. 

We’re not aware of struggle in the moment. We’re just focused on our goal. We lose site of how amazing the time we’re spending grinding is. Some days are harder than others. In the moment, we despise these days.

What if instead of despising struggle we embraced it? 

If we recognize it’s part of every process, can we enjoy it in the moment?

 I believe we can. It’s a mindset shift. Shifting from wishing those tough days away to accepting they’re going to happen and even enjoying the work.

Instead of focusing on the end result, at all times, focus on what you’re doing on a day to day basis. Focus on the tough moments. Acknowledge when things are hard and when you want to give up. This is the struggle.

How do you expect to push through these tough moments if you’re not expecting them to come? Most people don’t. They usually give up at this point never knowing what could have been.

Be aware that the struggle will happen. Embrace struggle for what it is – tough, shitty, boring, and exhausting work.

Struggle is where we grow. It’s how we change ourselves.

Struggle isn’t all that bad if we see it as a necessary hurdle on the path to achieving our goals. 

How do you expect to hit your goal if you don’t have a plan or set steps in place to get there?

It’s like running a race but you don’t know where the finish line is. You’re running blind. You work really hard to get there but with no direction. You can run faster and faster but it won’t necessarily do anything. What do you think would happen?

Of course you’ll end up short. You might get there by some miracle but you won’t be able to replicate those results again.

Reverse engineer your goals. If you want to sell $1,000,000 in a year you need to figure out how many meetings you need to have. You need to figure out what your close rate is. You need to figure out how many touches to potential prospects you need to make.

Planning isn’t that hard. It takes 20 Minutes the day before. It takes a couple of hours on a Sunday to prepare for your week. It’s thinking about the daily goals you need to hit and the meetings you have. It’s planning your day into blocks of time to make sure you’re on track.

Planning isn’t sexy. It’s not fun. It’s not exciting. Planning is the way you work smarter not harder. It’s needed to hit any target.

Without planning you’re blindly doing tasks. You have no major focuses for the day. You end up spending your days working much harder than you need to and having very little to show for it.

It’s the behind the scenes work like planning that sets you on a path to accomplishing your major goals. Make planning a top priority.

“Being busy does not always mean real work. The object of all work is production or accomplishment and to either of these ends there must be forethought, system, planning, intelligence, and honest purpose, as well as perspiration. Seeming to do is not doing.” -Thomas A. Edison

Be open to other people’s opinions. 

Instead of immediately disregarding what they have to say and beginning your attack, listen. Hear them out. 

Why do you believe what you believe? 

Maybe you’ve researched the topic. You hang around people who feel the same way. Maybe your parents influenced you. 

The problem is you’ve only been on one side. You’ve always heard the same thing.

Listen to different opinions. Be open to changing your mind.

Your opinions should evolve over time. 

Winning an argument isn’t the goal. The goal is to genuinely listen and be open to someone’s perspective.

Listen to their point of view to understand where they’re coming from instead of listening to answer.

The next conversation you have where someone feels differently than you about a topic pause, listen, digest what they’re saying, and then answer.

“Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought.” – John F. Kennedy

The best way to conquer perceived difficult tasks or activities is to try them.

Are you afraid of public speaking? Join a toastmasters group or sign up for a public speaking course.

Afraid of skiing? Hire a ski instructor and learn to ski.

Afraid of deep water? Go put yourself in a situation where you have to be in deep water.

The best way to get over these “terrifying” activities is to actually try them. If you never attempt to get over them you’ll always be afraid.

That’s, of course, easier said then done.

Going all in is the best way to get over it but you can take it step by step.

Do you want to quit your job and start a business? Maybe the best route for you is to start a project on the side. Start small by attempting what you want. You may be afraid to go all in if you have other obligations – family, kids, house, college payments, etc. That’s understandable.

You should be afraid to try certain things. Fear is normal. It’s your ability to use that fear to your benefit. Fear helps you conquer daunting tasks.

The way you feel before a race or speech is exactly how everyone else felt their first time. It’s how a lot of people still feel even if they’ve done it a thousand times.

You’re not different. You’re not weird or worse than others because you feel like this. You’re trying something new and difficult. That’s how you should feel.

Be confident in your abilities to successfully complete the task at hand.

Practice and practice. Attempt your speech. Swim in a pool. Start that side project. Run a small race.

Just start doing what you’re afraid of. That’s how you conquer irrational fear.

Once you’ve done it you’ll wonder why it took you so long to start. It’s usually not as daunting as you thought.

We create barriers for ourselves. 

Think of one thing you’re afraid of and hit it head on. You can either start small or jump right in. Write down the activities that you’ve been putting off and the fears you have associated with those activities. Write why you haven’t yet started and how you’ll go about starting.

Don’t wait till tomorrow to attempt something that should start today. Tomorrow will never come.

“If you want to conquer fear, don’t sit at home and think about it. Go out and get busy. ” -Dale Carnegie

Anyone can improve if they have the willingness to learn and the belief that they can achieve their goals. 

If you don’t believe in your product, mission, or yourself you’ll never get better. That’s where it ends.

How do you expect to get better if you don’t think you can? 

You need to be willing to look dumb. You need to be open to making mistakes. You need to listen to other people’s feedback who have done what you’re trying to do.

Learn from your mistakes instead of repeating your failed attempts. 

You need to be willing to experiment with different ways of learning. You must try different approaches to figure out what works best for you.

Not everyone learns the same way. 

Enjoy the process of learning. Enjoy the failed attempts knowing you’ll eventually succeed. 

Is it because we don’t believe we can do? Maybe it’s the project. We don’t believe in what we’re doing anymore. Maybe it’s gotten too hard or we don’t have enough time.

Whenever we start something it’s exciting. It’s new. It’s fun.

You’re willing to put in the time because it’s exhilarating. It’s almost like a drug. You can’t get enough of it. 

That feeling wears off after a few weeks or months of hard work. That’s when most of us start looking for something else that’s new and exciting.

That initial feeling is so intoxicating that we want to continue that feeling for as long as we can. The feeling usually comes from trying something else. 

Moving onto so something else is easy. Quitting is easy. When something gets too difficult we stop. When we don’t know what next steps to take we stop. We wave the white flag. We give up on the project.

Quitting isn’t always a bad decision but continuously jumping from project to project hoping for quick success will never work.

Why we give up comes down to a variety of reasons. They’re mostly excuses.

Figure out why you’ve given up on something before. Pin point the problem and fix it.

There’s a reason.

It could be a fear of failure. It could a lack of belief in yourself or your product. It could be a fear of what other people think about you. It could be a lack of confidence in yourself.

Whatever the reason is, figure out what you’re really afraid of. Figure out why you’re worried about other people.

Take the time to reflect. Learn from your various failed attempts. 

Don’t let your past failures deter you from trying again. 

Positivity is not something that happens overnight. It’s not something that always comes natural. It’s not easy to stay positive all the time.

Sometimes we have bad days. Sometimes we don’t want to do anything. Sometimes we’re filled with negative thoughts.

Instead of waiting for negativity to flood your mind, prepare yourself for positivity.

As soon as you wake up in the morning try journaling. 

Write down what you’re grateful for. Write down your daily goals and objectives. Write down how you feel whether that’s negative or positive. 

Journaling helps you get everything off your chest and helps you prioritize your day. It’s the best way to clear your mind first thing in the morning.

Tell yourself that today will be a great day. Let yourself know you’re great at what you do and you love what you do. There’s a reason why you were choosen for this position. You’re going to dominate the day. You’re going to help your clients achieve their goals.

If you prepare your mind with positivity and confidence, you’ll naturally become more positive and confident. 

When you feel negative thoughts creep into your mind, take a step back, acknowledge the thought, and move on.

You control your mind. You control your thoughts, negative or positive. You control your reaction. 

Prepare yourself for positivity. Prepare for victory. Prepare for prosperity. Prepare for happiness. 

Anything worth doing is difficult.

Accomplishing anything worthwhile will not be simple. If it was easy, everyone would do it. We woild all be rich. We would all be fit. We would always win. 

What would be the fun in that?

Whenever you’re learning something new go into it knowing it will be hard. Understand it will take time. Understand you will want to give up at points. 

Don’t succumb to these urges. Push yourself harder the more you want to stop. Challenge yourself to get better. Challenge yourself to be consistent. That’s where you separate yourself from the rest of the pack.

You will hit a wall. You’ll hit the point where you want to give up. If you push a little bit harder you’ll hit your goal.

Understand coming in to it that you’ll hit that wall. Be prepared for the hard parts. Prepare for it.

Once you start to feel stagnant switch it up. Try different strategies. If it’s learning a new language, figure out what worked well for other people. Once you feel like you’ve hit a wall, find other strategies.

It will be worth it. Just push a little bit harder. 

Quitting is easy. Pushing through is hard. 

Would you rather be remembered as a person who tried a million things and quit or someone who stuck with a select few things and succeeded?

Don’t worry about what the future brings. Instead, imagine what you want your future to look like.

Do you like in a big house? Do you have a wife and kids? Where do you live? What do you do for a living? What do you care about? What do you do in your free time?

Think about what you want. Don’t write down what you think you should be doing. Don’t try to appease anyone but yourself.

This shouldn’t be a quick exercise. It shouldn’t stay static. This should be an ever changing future. You can change what you want.

Think big about your future. Don’t sell yourself short.

Take time to think deeply about your life and where you see yourself in 5 or 10 or 20 years.

It’s good to focus on the current moment but you must have some idea of where you want to be. 

Be as detailed as possible. Write down everything you want and who you want to be. 

The vehicle you drive – or other types of transportation, the color of your house, the animals you’ll have, the place or places you’ll live, the things you’ll accomplish, etc.

This shouldn’t be a painful exercise. Have fun with it. Get creative and write down anything you feel.

Writing it down makes it feel more realistic. You can go back to that piece of paper whenever you want. If you’re doing something that doesn’t fit in line with your end goals, move on.

Your future is bright. Now that you have your end in mind, work backwards to make it happen.

“Oh I will become what I desire.” – Ben Howard

You can change it. 

You can be open or closed to ideas. You can perceive goals as impossible or difficult but worth it.

You can believe you can do it or you can believe you can’t.

Your perception doesn’t have to stay the same. You control your perception of the world, the people you meet, and the situations that happen.

If you believe in something and others don’t, that’s their perception. People see the world differently. You shouldn’t change your perception because someone wants you to.

We see the same events differently.

When it’s cloudy and raining most people think it’s a crappy day. It’s usually associated with a depressing or overall bad start to a day.

Some people look at it as a positive.

Cloudy and rainy days can be good. It’s all about how you look at the situation. It’s either negative or positive. You have control over how you perceive it.

We see things not as they are but from our own point of view. We can change our environment simply by changing our view of the events that happen.

Try to look at things differently. 

You have deep beliefs about certain things. Look at it from a different angle. You may realize your life isn’t nearly as bad as you had imagined.

Be aware of the way you perceive the world. You control the way you react and perceive the world around you. You have more control over your life than you know.

“There is no truth. There is only perception.” -Gustave Flaubert

Have you ever gone into a conversation or a new environment or a big game wishing you weren’t there?

You know going in it’s going to be hard. It’s different. It’s uncomfortable. It’s scary. It’s nerve racking.

Your mind is telling you to back down. You might as well not risk it. Pack it up before you go out there. It’s probably not worth the embarrassment that could possibly happen.

Then what happens? 

We go into that conversation or into that game and realize it wasn’t nearly as bad as we thought. We compete and do better than we ever expected. It’s easier than we thought. 

Those are the experiences and events that make us better. Those are the moments that change us forever.

Instead of running away from the conversations and events that scare us we should be running toward them.

We should be trying to find as many uncomfortable conversations and situations as we can. That’s the way you get better at everything in life.

Next time you get into a situation where you feel uncomfortable or nervous or worried think differently.

That moment is crucial for your improvement. It’s crucial for your future. You’ll figure out what to do.

Whenever you want to avoid a tough conversation or want to quit during a race, take a moment to think. Could this be the conversation or moment that changes my life?

You never know. 

The things we least want to do are the most important for us to do. 

Address your fears head on instead of avoiding them. Eventually you’ll have to face them. Why not now?